If you’re anything like me, all it takes is a quick jam session to a loud, upbeat song to get me pumped up. So, with this month being all about celebrating women over here on my blog, I thought I’d share a few of my favorite songs that do just that and inspire me!

1.) “Not That Kinda Girl” – Fifth Harmony (feat. Missy Elliot)

This is just one of those songs that you bump as your getting ready for a night out drinking and dancing with your girls!

Fav Line: “Yeah, tryna tell you, you don’t get it, you wanna touch it, you’ll regret it, you’ll see, try me!”

 

 

 

2.) “Watch Me Do” – Meghan Trainor

This is the kind of song that you blast in the morning when you wake up and need an extra boost of confidence while you prep to take on the day!

Fav Line: “I ain’t sayin’ I’m the besteses, but I got nice curves, nice breasteses!”

 

 

3.) “Sit Still Look Pretty” – Daya

Whenever I find myself getting sad about not having a guy in my life, I play this song and remember that I don’t want to settle.

Fav Line: “Oh, I don’t know what you’ve been told, but this girl right here’s gonna rule the world!”

 

 

 

4.) “Salute” – Little Mix

On days when I need to remind myself of how strong I am and how strong all women are, this is the song I blast. It reminds me we are stronger when we stand together.

Fav Line: “Can’t stop a hurricane, ladies, it’s time to awake!”

 

 

 

5.) “Love Myself” – Hailee Steinfeld

When I’m feeling down, especially when it comes to body image, this is the song I play. I go for a run, blast this song on repeat & remind myself of all the reasons I should love myself the way I am and be thankful for all that my body can do!

Fav Line: “I’m gonna put my body first and love me so hard ’til it hurts, I know how to scream out the words, scream the words, I love me!” 

 

 

Add these songs to your #GirlBoss or favorite playlist, invite your favorite girls over for drinks, and let the dance party commence! Just make sure to invite me because I say on the dance floor! 😉

If you know me at all, you know that I’m a lipstick fanatic. I seriously can not get enough! It’s the one beauty product I would love to have a lifetime supply of. And as I’ve grown my collection over the years I’ve discovered a few choice shades that have quickly made their way into my go-to collection. So, I thought I’d share a few of them below in case you want to try any of them out for yourself. And in my experience, these three colors look good on almost everyone!

1.) “Alyssa” by ColourPop, $6.00 at Colourpop.com

I originally bought this lipstick because I figured we share the same name, so it must be the perfect shade for me, right? And I am so happy I wasn’t wrong! It’s categorized as “a muted pink,” and I would add that it has a peachy undertone. It’s an Ultra Satin Lip, goes on super creamy, and stays on all day! I’ve been struggling to find a nude/pink color that suits my yellow undertoned skin and I feel like I’ve found something close with this. It’s my everyday, go-to shade!

2.) “Patina” by Stila Cosmetics, $24.00 at stilacosmetics.com, Ulta or Sephora

I received this shade a few years ago for Christmas in a set of 6 other shades and I immediately fell in love. It’s categorized as a “dusty rose” shade and is a Stay All Day Liquid Lipstick. And it really does y’all. I have yet to find another liquid lipstick that stays put like Stila’s does. This is another shade that I feel like I could wear everyday and it’s perfect for spring!

3.) “Touch of Spice” by Maybelline, $4.99 at Target and other drugstores

I saw my friend Courtney (my fellow lipstick fanatic!) putting on this shade at a bridal shower & I knew I had to have it. I wore it for the bridal shower & went out the next day and bought it for myself. It’s from Maybelline’s Color Sensational line and is in the Creamy Mattes category. It’s a deep mauve, berry color and goes on super creamy! I normally stay away from regular lipstick because I am always disappointed by their lasting ability, but this one is different. It stays on for much longer than I expected with minimal reapplying needed! I love this one for a night out or special events!

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So, if you’re lipstick obsessed just like me, you now have three shades you must go and buy! Or, if you’re not quite sure about lipstick, you have an idea of where to start! And if you have any suggestions on any lipsticks I should buy, I’m all ears!

Also, here’s an unedited picture of me with lipstick on in all my bare-faced glory.

When I took this photo, I didn’t expect it to come out good, but let me say I was pleasantly surprised. While I love how I look when I’m all done up, I often forget that makeup is just something that I like to spend time perfecting, but it doesn’t take the place of real beauty. After today, I think I’ll rock the bare-faced look a little more often in celebration of my true beauty!

xoxo,

alyssa

 

Like any other normal girl, I’ve often dreamed of what my future husband will be like. What he’ll look like, the types of things he’ll be interested in, the type of character he’ll have. Normal stuff. While most of that stuff I’m willing to compromise on, his character is not one of those things. And instead of listing out the type of character traits I would like my future husband to have, I thought it would be more fun to list out 10 male characters I think emulate the types of things I would like to see in my future husband. So here goes.

10.) James Lansome, from “First Daughter”

If you’re thinking who?!, I beg you to drop what you’re doing and watch this movie right now. It was one of my favorite movies growing up and I had a massive crush on the love interest, James. Without spoiling the storyline for those of you who haven’t seen it, I’ll just tell you that James is wonderful. He is kind and gentle with Samantha, but also very protective of her. He is respectful of her at all times, but also challenges her when necessary. His love for her is quiet, but steady.

9.) Ross Geller, from “Friends”

While Ross often makes poor decisions where love is concerned, the one decision he always got right was loving Rachel. It took them up until the series finale to finally figure things out, but his love for her never changed. Even though he was married to two other women throughout the series, he always showed his love for Rachel by showing up. He was always there for her as a friend and even after they dated and broke up (and dated and broke up) he never stopped caring about. He didn’t allow their past to change how he cared for her as a friend and I think that is commendable.

8.) Nathan Scott, from “One Tree Hill”

I will admit, I was hesitant to put this on here because I don’t know if I really like Nathan as a character that much. He handles conflict poorly and always seems to be the center of some drama, but I guess that’s what you get for living in a small town. However, his one redeeming quality for me is in his unwavering love and devotion to Haley. He always puts her first and continues to love her fiercely, even when everyone around him, including Haley herself, questions his love.

7.) Jess Mariano, from “Gilmore Girls”

Another flawed character with a redeeming quality: his love for Rory Gilmore. I don’t think that Jess by any means was a good boyfriend to Rory. He kept trying to break her and Dean up when they were together and he ran away without telling her or speaking to her again. And while none of that makes him great boyfriend material, what I do think he offers her that no one else did was that he always challenged her to be better. He pushed her to try harder and ultimately be the best version of herself she could be. Even in the series sequel, he challenges her to write a book and she does, so she obviously regards his opinions very highly. #TeamJess

6.) Ezra Fitz, from “Pretty Little Liars”

While I definitely do not feel good about him dating a student, it’s really hard not to love Erza. He’s smart, well-read, and writer. I completely understand why Aria fell for him. He is not only protective of Aria, but he challenges her creatively, which is a huge thing for me. I want someone to understand my creative side the way that Mr. Fitz gets Aria’s creativity.

5.) Seeley Booth, from “Bones”

Booth is seemingly perfect on paper. He is smart, intuitive, funny, protective of his family, loyal to his friends, has a strong set of morals and a slew of other positive character traits. While he does have his problems with gambling (and it does come between him and Bones a few times), he will do whatever it takes to make sure that his family gets to sleep safely at night. And perhaps what I admire most about him is that even though Bones sees the world in a very different way than he does, he never lets that change his own core set of morals and beliefs. Instead, he challenges her to look outside herself and see things from a different perspective.

4.) Jay Halstead, from “Chicago P.D.”

I’ve only been watching Chicago P.D. for the last two seasons, but man let me tell you, I have fallen in love with Jay. He is tough, doesn’t back down from a challenge, and isn’t intimidated by the fact that his girlfriend is also a badass detective who could kick any guys’ ass. He does his best to protect her (even though she likes to take care of herself) and is there for her like no one else is. Plus he always carries a shotgun whenever they’re going on a raid/man hunt/mission, so he gets an A++ in my book.

3.) Wyatt Logan, from “Timeless”

If you’re not already watching this show, do yourself a favor and start watching it now. If for nothing else than this guy. Wyatt is ex-Delta Force; he is strong, protective of his team and will stop at nothing to bring justice about. And while those are all great qualities, my favorite thing about him is his unwavering devotion to his late wife. You learn in the series that Wyatt’s wife was murdered and they never caught the killer. And even though she’s dead, his love for her has never ceased. He even hijacks the time machine to go back in time to prevent her death from happening. That’s how much he loves her and misses her. I want someone with that kind of devotion.

2.) Troy Bolton, from “High School Musical”

If you’re surprised that he’s not my number one, you’re not the only one. Troy has always been my number one go-to when I think about the type of guy I want to marry one day. He is funny, charming, athletic, thoughtful and creative. Pretty much a perfect mixture of everything. While he is kind of slow to admit his love for Gabriella, it ultimately grows throughout the three movies. In the end he is so confident in their love that he makes the conscious decision to attend UC Berkeley, which is 32.7 miles away from Stanford University, where Gabriella will be attending. If that isn’t romantic I don’t know what is!!!

1.) Jamie Reagan, “Blue Bloods”

My sister and I always talk about how Jamie is our ultimate dream man. He is smart (he graduated from Harvard Law before deciding on becoming a cop after his brother was murdered), he is funny and doesn’t take himself to seriously, he never passes up an opportunity to help someone in need, and most importantly he has a strong set of morals. His family has joked on more than one occasion that he is the only one in the family who could have been a priest. He sees things a little differently than his family and challenges them to change their perspectives. And when it comes to love, he is protective and respectful. He and his partner, Eddie, have a ton of chemistry and they both have admitted to liking each other, but they don’t want to give up being partners just to see where their relationship might go. And Jamie respects that decision, but that doesn’t stop him from always looking out for her, even beyond the workday. Simply put, Jamie is a good guy with a heart of gold.

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What I’ve learned from these male characters is that ultimately, I want someone who is protective of me. I want to feel and know that I am safe, both physically and emotionally. I want someone who has a good sense of humor & doesn’t take himself too seriously, but doesn’t feel the need to be the center of attention all the time. I want someone who is creative in some sense of the word, but not necessarily in the same way I’m creative. Creativity is important to me and I think it would be awesome to share that with someone. I want someone who has a strong moral compass and doesn’t waver in their beliefs, but at the same time can keep an open mind. I want someone who challenges me to be the best version of myself. And most importantly, at the end of the day, I want someone who is committed, holds an unshakeable love for me, and is my best friend.

I know that’s kind of a lot of things to desire in a future husband, but to me they are important character traits that I don’t want to compromise on. And I know that this guy exists, I just haven’t found him yet!

 

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P.S. If you are a male and feel you meet the requirements listed above, feel free to slide into my DMs 😉 I am single and ready to mingle!!!

It’s been a week since Kelsey and I became two of the luckiest girls on the planet. Most of you have already seen my photo with Carly and Evan, but you’ve probably been wondering one of two things: 1.) If you’re not a Bachelor fan, you’re probably wondering who the heck they are and why we took a picture with them or 2.) If you’re a Bachelor fan, you’re probably wondering how we managed to take a picture with them. Here’s a little backstory.

 

Kelsey and I are both avid watchers of the Bachelor, Bachelorette & Bachelor in Paradise. And we follow all of our fav contestants on Instagram. About the second week in December, we stumbled upon a post from one of the twins, I believe, that stated there was going to be a premiere party in LA for Nick’s season of the Bachelor. You could buy tickets and meet some of your favorite contestants. Kelsey and I looked into it briefly, but they were unfortunately too expensive and we decided it wasn’t worth it.

However, a few days later, Evan Bass posted on his Instagram that he was going to be holding a contest and giving away two tickets to the premiere party. All you had to do was comment something nice on his post about your favorite Bachelor/Bachelorette contestant. Kelsey DM-ed me on Instagram and we decided that we had to do it. What harm could be done? Never in a million years did I think that we would win. I have never been that lucky. A few days later, he deleted the post from his Instagram entirely and we were so disappointed.

Little did I know, Kelsey is super sneaky and thoughtful and DM-ed Evan on Instagram saying that she really wanted to win the tickets because her friend (ME!!!) is born on Christmas Eve and feels like she always gets overlooked (YEP!) and it would be the perfect birthday present for me! Her sneakiness and thoughtfulness paid off though because Evan messaged her back a week later and said “Ok you win! :).” Kelsey immediately wrote him back making sure it was real and it was!!!

The morning she found out I had 6 missed calls and like 4 messages from her and I thought she was dying. Turns out she just won the contest and we were going to LA to meet all our favorite Bachelor people in person!!!

For the next two weeks we were freaking out. We needed a new outfit, new shoes, new makeup, new everything if we were going to be on par with the Bachelor peeps! By the time the actual date rolled around, I couldn’t believe that it was really happening to us. We were still half expecting to show up and there not be a party or find out we weren’t going to be allowed in.

We drove down the morning of the premiere, had a quick lunch, stocked up on contouring products & rushed to my sister’s apartment at school where we were staying to get ready for the event. After spending way too long picking out and outfit and perfecting our contours (which we learned how to do from a video we watched in the car on the way down!) we were off to have the night of our lives.

The event was at Sycamore Tavern on Sunset Ave. We valeted our car and waited in the line outside for about thirty minutes before being let in to the event space. Kelsey and I shared a table with six other girls and we all eagerly awaited the arrival of our favorite Bachelor contestants.

One by one, they started to come in from a side door after taking pictures and talking to press outside. Once people realized where they were coming in from, they began crowding around the door to the point that poor Ben Higgins couldn’t even get inside. They just kept pounding on the door yelling “Ben! Ben! Ben!” Eventually he was let in and the real party began!

The previous contestants spread themselves out throughout the event space while people pushed and clamored for a chance to take a picture and chat for a second. IT WAS INSANITY. Neither Kelsey or I are socially aggressive people, so it was a struggle for a hot second to figure out what we needed to do. After a bit we decided that we just had to be a bit aggressive and get the pictures that we came for.

James Taylor was our first conquest and let me tell you, he is so cute in person! He’s very tall and broad-chested and that’s just how I like them! The only downside is that he was very, very drunk. We ran into him a second time that night and Kelsey told him how much we loved his swing dancing date with JoJo and he got weirdly emotional and said he didn’t expect to talk about that that night. So that’s how that went, LOL.

We sought out Carly and Evan next because we wanted to thank them for the tickets. When we found them and Kelsey told them who we were they got so genuinely excited! We snapped a picture with them and chatted briefly about how our drive down was and they both wished me a happy birthday! Such. Nice. People. And cutest couple, for sure!

We tried to get a picture with Chase, but he was so mobbed by girls. And they weren’t budging. But I can’t blame them because he is so attractive in person! He is also very tall and broad-chested. My one regret is that I didn’t fight harder to get a picture with him.

Kelsey was kind enough to let me wait in line twice to meet Becca Tilley. And holy cow she is gorgeous! Like honestly the prettiest person who has ever been on the show. Hands down. And she was so genuinely nice. She was hugging every single person in her line and was making it a point to be intentional about having conversations with them. We talked about Tone It Up and how we both need someone to hold us accountable. She told me to keep in touch so we could make sure we were both working out. I messaged her on Instagram and I will absolutely die if she ever messages me back.

We also got a couple pictures with Lauren Bushnell and Amanda Stanton. Both so beautiful, but they seemed a little like they didn’t want to be there. I’m sure it was just the fact that they were literally surrounded by a sea of people and being touched and pulled in different directions. They both slay though and are the cutest besties!

It took us a while because he had a huge crowd around him, but we eventually got a picture with Ben Higgins. My goodness is he cute in person! On TV he’s cute, but in comparison to a lot of the other guys, I think he comes out pretty average. But in person is a whole other story. His eyes literally sparkle and the long lashes are just an added bonus. His sweater was also really soft and had elbow patches. I told him I liked it and he said thanks, sticking out his elbows for me.

We also ran into Alex Woytkiw from JoJo’s season and that was a wonderful surprise. And if you thought he was short on television, let me tell you, he is somehow smaller in person. I’m 5’4″ and I was wearing 3-4 inch heels and his bio says that he’s 5’7″, but I felt like I was much taller than him. Just sayin. He was super sweet though! He was all about taking a picture with us and told us to stay safe that night! I told him the same because, c’mon, a tiny man in a room full of aggressive women?!??!? YIKES.

After walking around for 3 hours, we decided we were basically done, but we knew we had to wait it out because we hadn’t gotten a picture with our favorites: THE TWINS. We hung out near the VIP door that a lot of the contestants were coming in and out of to wait the twins out. They came down a few moments later and were immediately swarmed. I thought we were never going to get a picture, but we managed to snag them, snap a photo, tell them they were our favs and then move out of the way before we got trampled.

There were a few others that we saw, but never got to take a picture with because our feet were going to fall off if we didn’t take our heels off RIGHT THAT MINUTE. Ashley I. was rocking the boxer braids and pink glittery eye shadow. We really wanted a picture with her and to tell her that her makeup was ON FLEEK, but she kept moving around and we never go the chance to grab her. We also saw Wells, but the line was too freaking long and though he’s cute and goofy, he wasn’t worth loosing our feet over. I also saw Brooks Forester from Desiree Harstock’s (now Siegfried ❤ ❤ <3) season. I had to do a double take, but I wasn’t sure that was him. It was unexpected and so cool to see him!

After we left, we headed to In-N-Out, gorged ourselves on burgers and fries and cried because the contestants were doing the same thing at the In-N-Out across the street from the venue. If only we stayed a little longer and went to that In-N-Out instead!

Overall, it was a really fun and interesting experience. Kelsey and I both agreed we would never pay to do it, unless we had the money to be a VIP because we assume you get more time with them. Also, all the girls and most of the boys are TINY AF. Like the girls are all 5’2″ sizes 00-4 (and look slightly anorexic, not gonna lie) and the boys barely clear 5’7″ and are lean, lean, lean. I was just so shocked at how different their sizing looks on TV, but I digress.

Here’s a picture gallery of the photos we snapped from the night so you can vicariously live through us! 🙂

Seriously, I will never forget this night! And if you are somehow reading this Evan, thanks a million! ❤

xoxo,

alyssa

Alright friends. I know I haven’t posted in a while and I could make up a million excuses as to why, but it all boils down to one thing: I didn’t feel like I was ready. While I’ve talked about how this past year or so of life hasn’t been the easiest, the one thing it has given me is the chance to really reflect on what I truly want out of life. And I know the answer to that. It’s what I’ve always known. I want to be a writer, in every sense of the word. I want to blog, write novels and anything and everything between.

I thought that quitting Chick-Fil-A in July would open up my scheduling to whole-heartedly pursue that passion. And while it did, I just kept putting off the opportunity a free schedule was giving me. I filled up my schedule with other things than the main thing I was passionate about doing. Before quitting I always said that my dream job would be to stay at home and write all day. And I finally was giving myself my dream job (though no one was paying me, but that’s a moot point). So what the heck was my problem?!??!

It wasn’t that I didn’t have the time because I knew I did (and still do). It was that I wasn’t sure I was ready. Am I ready to start blogging? I don’t have a nice camera to shoot with, I don’t have an actual website with a minimalistic design, I don’t have the money, I don’t have enough content, etc., etc., etc. I went round and round in this circle for months. I needed more time to collect resources, save up money, and come up with ideas I told myself. But yet, I never used the time I had to do start gathering the things I told myself I needed to be a successful blogger.

Just last month, I finally took the step and I began following various blogs and social media strategists on Instagram and subscribed to their newsletters. I collected everything I felt I needed to begin a blog and make it perfect and clean and creative and relevant. And if I’m honest, I’m still in the process of collecting those things because I want to feel prepared. I want my blog to be perfect.

It wasn’t until I sat down and had a conversation today at Temple Coffee with the guys at Storyteller Media, Mike and Emilio, that I realized I’ve been waiting around for the perfect moment to start my blog, when such a thing doesn’t exist. Emilio shared with me how he held himself back for 2 years from starting a YouTube page because he didn’t feel ready. Once he took the plunge and started his channel and saw all the views he was getting, he realized that he should have taken the plunge earlier.

I’ve been holding myself back from really starting a blog because I was fearful that the result would be less than I hoped for. And isn’t that what most people are afraid of when they are thinking about starting something new? We’re scared people won’t care, no one will respond and no one will see it. And while those are all valid fears, I’m tired of holding myself back from something just because the result might not be what I hoped for. If that’s what happens then fine. I’ll make adjustments, but at least I’ll have tried.

Funnily enough I just recently bought a Giving Key bangel bracelet (if you don’t know about this awesome company, then you should really look them up) and today was the first day I wore it. I chose to have the word “Fearless” printed on mine after reading the article Five Ways to Debunk You Fear of Failure (http://yellowconference.com/2016/11/11/five-ways-to-debunk-fear-of-failure/). I was inspired by the way Nicole pursued fearlessness and the things she learned from doing so. I guess I had already internally realized that being fearful of every situation was holding me back and causing me to miss out on experiences that would grow me. So, I purchased mine and have every intention of wearing it every day as a simple reminder to not let fear – of failure, awkwardness, disappointment, etc. – hold me back form going after the things I want. And it just so happened that the first day I wore it, I was challenged with facing the fear of starting a blog without having it be perfect. Well played universe, well played.

Wearing my Giving Key today and having that conversation with Emilio and Mike has inspired me and given me the confidence to charge full speed ahead in the direction of my dreams and passions. Who cares if it’s bad at first or no one really sees it. You have to start somewhere. You can’t just wait around for the rest of your life for the perfect moment to start because it doesn’t exist.

So, this is me taking the plunge. I’m making a commitment to pursue blogging wholeheartedly this year. I know at times it won’t be easy or turn out the way I want it to, but there’s beauty in simply trying. Stay tuned for new posts and my very own website coming soon (thanks Matt Howe!).

xoxo,

Alyssa

P.S. Those super awesome guys at Storyteller Media, Mike and Emilio, not only inspired me to pursue my dreams on my own, but also with them as an intern Blogger as they continue to grow their business. I’m STOKED to say the least!!! So, stay tuned for updates on that and the things I’m learning from them!!! And check them out because they’re legit: http://www.storytellermco.com/meetourteam.html

Unemployment is a very strange monster. You have all the time in the world, yet absolutely no money. You can finally do all the fun things you’ve dreamed of, but you have no way to pay for them. It’s a very, very sharp double-edged sword that you wield. And while most of my days these past two months have been filled with binging out on all the TV I missed this past year, I’ve also tried to carve out a little bit of space for creativity.

If I’m being honest with you, this hasn’t gone very well. Inspiration is also a strange monster that tends to come and go as it pleases. I haven’t quite been able to trap this monster long enough to create something of worth. And the more and more days that pass by without some sort of creative endeavor, the more and more I panic about whether or not I should have quit my job to pursue something so fleeting.

I know that this panic and anxiety comes from a place of fear. Fear that nothing I do or write or create will be ever be good enough and I’ll have spent my life slaving away at my computer and lost in the fantasy world that is my mind for nothing.

Rather than let this fear settle in completely, I’ve chosen to let it motivate me. And right now, that motivation looks like trying daily to write something–anything–and simultaneously studying what living a creative life looks like.

Around the time that I quit my job, I bought several books online regarding creativity and living the kind of life you’ve always dreamed of. I imagined that I would ravenously read them and one day talk about the stack of books that changed my life. Sometimes I truly slay myself with how much of a ridiculous dreamer I am! I didn’t get further than 10 pages into half of the books I bought before I threw them on the floor because they weren’t what I thought they would be. (And that’s a very accurate picture of what my life looks like, thinking & dreaming that things will be one way, only to be massively disappointed because reality is way harsher than my dreams, but that’s a different blog post entirely).

However, there was one diamond in the rough: Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert. I’m still in the thick of reading it and trying desperately hard not to underline every. single. sentence. because everything in this book speaks straight to my soul. The book is basically like taking a microscope to creativity and discovering the magic of it. (This is a very terrible summary, but I promise if you hold yourself to be a creative of any sort, this is a MUST READ).

While there are literally 1000+ little nuggets that have stood out to me in the short 100 pages that I have already read, the biggest thing that I am taking away from it right now is what she calls “Creative Entitlement.” I won’t belabor the point or take away your experience of reading this section for yourself, but her main point is that you can’t really begin to be a free creative unless you believe that you are entitled to create. You must believe that you are allowed to be here and take up space. And that simply by taking up space, you are entitled to create. It’s as simple as that.

WHOA. This is, like, so obvious and true, but it blew my mind. I’ve never doubted that my biggest passion in life is to create. It’s woven into my identity and will forever be a part of me. But it’s so hard for me to stand up, take up space and proclaim that I can and will create, no matter the outcome. I guess I’ve been waiting around for a permission slip or something that says, yes Alyssa, you are allowed to create.

And I guess that circles back around to fear. Each day that I wake up, I can feel the need to create pulsing inside of me, but most of the time before my feet hit the floor, fear has settled in and is telling me all the reasons that I am not allowed to create and showing me all the areas in which I fall short of being a true creative. Obviously this is no way to live.

So, I’m working on cultivating this creative arrogance inside of me so that fear no longer controls how and when I can create. And don’t worry, I’m not under any false impression that by reading this section in the book today that I’ll be free to create without my fears, insecurities and anxieties creeping in. I know they will always be there on the other side of the door, waiting to attack me. I’m just choosing to no longer be afraid of defending myself and taking up my rightful creative space, even if it will be a daily struggle.

 

If you’re reading this and your going “duh, Alyssa, I already knew all this, welcome to the party,” well then good for you and where can I get some of your self confidence? But if you’re like me and need daily affirmation, then I’ll leave you with a passage from Big Magic for moments when fear tells you to get back inside your dark, creative-less hole.

“Who the hell do you think you are?” your darkest interior voices will demand.

“It’s funny you should ask,” you can reply. “I’ll tell you who I am: I am a child of God, just like anyone else. I am a constituent of this universe. I have invisible spirit benefactors who believe in me, and who labor alongside me. The fact that I am here at all is evidence that I have the right to be here. I have a right to my own voice and a right to my own vision. I have a right to collaborate with creativity, because I myself  am a product and a consequence of Creation. I’m on a mission of artistic liberation, so let the girl go.”  – Gilbert, p. 96

I plan to let this girl go and see where my creativity takes me, because in the end I’m doing this for me.

xoxo,

Alyssa

 

It’s no secret to anyone who knows me that this past year that post-grad has been pretty hard for me. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: I’m terrible at transitions. I much prefer jumping into the next big thing, rather than waiting around for something to happen. But this year has taught me so much about what it means to wait, and wait patiently. And all the time I’ve been waiting to figure out what I’m supposed to be doing with my life has given me the ability to discover what truly makes me happy. Which, in turn, has made me realize that a lot of the way I have lived this past year has let negative thoughts, actions & choices rule my life. And I don’t want to do that anymore.

I still have a long way to go with making choices that make me happy (& happiness is a choice in itself, right?), but I’m ready to embark on living a healthier lifestyle: mentally, physically, spiritually & emotionally.

First, I’m tackling the physical aspect of living healthy. I recently became a member of the Tone It Up community (and if you don’t know what that is, I highly recommend checking those girls and what they’re doing out! They’re amazing!). It’s something I’ve wanted to do for a few years now, but I’ve always made up an excuse not to take the plunge. Long story short, with the membership I have access to hundreds of healthy recipes & workouts!  For me, this is the first positive step forward in living a physically healthy life. And really, the reason I’m sharing this with whoever decides to read it is because I’m hoping you’ll provide some sort of accountability for me.

I’m really excited about my decision to join the Tone It Up community and I know if I just stay committed, I will see positive results!

It’s the end of the first week of February, and to be honest, it was a rough one. It was free breakfast giveaway at Chick-Fil-A this week, which means every morning we gave away 1000+ free items to 1000+ people. We also just hired two new girls, which means that I have a lot more on my plate on top of working 35+ hours a week. And on top of it all, I have a horrendous cold that’s been leaving me feeling very weak and hollow. Due to all this stress, I’ve been living half in the real world, half in my own personal dream land. Here a few of my favorite things that I’ve been daydreaming about this week:

Favorite Dream Vacation Spot: Rainy New York City! (via: isaacholden.com) Considering I’m going there in 2 months, I’ve kind of been thinking about it non-stop!

Favorite Dreamy Poem: Every single one of Tyler Knott Greyson’s poems are profound and beautifully worded. And they speak right to my soul. Every. Single. One. He’s definitely one of my favorite poets.

Favorite Dream Bathroom: I’m obsessed with the white tile and how much natural light there is in this bathroom! It looks very Greek to me, which is just another reason to be obsessed.

Favorite Dream Desk-scape: I’m in the process of organizing & decorating my desk, and I can only hope it turns out this gorgeously. I particularly love the desk lamp & the fresh flowers! S’cute!

Favorite Dream Dinner Party: I wish I was important/cool enough to have friends who would invite me to things like this. Or that I was simply awesome enough to through parties like this, Jay Gatsby style, on a regular basis.

Favorite Dream Cozy Moment: Harry Potter, cozy socks & wine by the fire with someone special? Yes please!

Here’s to hoping that next week is a little bit better than this week was! Catch some more of my favorite things next Friday!

XO, Alyssa

I think one of the post powerful things you can do as a woman is surround yourself with other like-minded women who inspire you, support you & encourage you through life’s adventures. I already have a handful of girls that I’ve surrounded myself with who do just that, but if I could add a few more ladies to my #GirlSquad, it would definitely be those listed below.

1. Blake Lively: She has the most gorgeous long legs, named her daughter James (UM, YES PLEASE), and she always looks classy no matter where she goes, even while pregnant! She started her own company and was honest about it’s failures, which I find humbling coming from a celebrity. She’s just so cute, and warm & kind and I would love to bake cupcakes with her at 4am on a Saturday night (see video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wjePVorYoHQ). I feel like she would add so much class and poise to my #GirlSquad.
2. Emma Watson: Not only do I think that she is simply gorgeous, but I also have mad respect for this girl and her beautiful mind. She graduated from Brown (with a degree in English Lit!), attended Oxford and is a major advocate for gender equality. She truly inspires me to care about real issues that can have a lasting impact and has demonstrated how to use your influence well. Also, she played the most bad a$$ chick there ever was: Hermione Granger. That alone earns her high ranking in my #GirlSquad.
3. Jennifer Lawrence: I honestly don’t know what to say, other than I love her. I think her acting range is much larger than a lot of people give her credit for. I also think she is hilarious and her personality is not all what I was initially expecting. I just appreciate how real she is, even if not everyone receives it well. You do you J-Law.
4. All the Girls from PLL (they count as one entity because I said so): I just really want to insert myself into the show and be friends with these fabulous girls. Like, seriously, how are you all 1 year out of college & working your dream jobs? Whatevs.
   1. Shay Mitchell: She not only plays a fearless pitbull on the show, but I think she’s a full-fledged one in real life. She reminds me that you should truly own who you are. I also really identify with the struggles that her character is facing on the show, post-graduation.
   2. Ashley Benson: This chick is FAB-U-LOUS. Both in PLL and outside of it. Her fashion sense is through the roof. She would add some grade A fabulosity to my #GirlSquad.
   3. Lucy Hale: Her character is probably the most annoying on the show to me, but she has the coolest publishing job in Boston, so I most definitely want to be her. Also, I wish I could rock the mega short hair as hard as she does.
   4. Troian Bellisario: She’s what I would define as an artistic soul. She does so much film wise outside of PLL and I respect that she doesn’t try to do major stuff, just things that she likes and is passionate about. She seems like a girl who knows what she likes and what she doesn’t and isn’t afraid to speak her mind about it. She strikes me as an incredibly intelligent woman and I can imagine us having really interesting, philosophical talks over coffee somewhere way off the beaten path.
5. Julianne Hough: The definition of a Hollywood Triple Threat. She can dance her a$$ off. She can sing like a broadway star (#GreaseLive anyone?). She can also freaking act. I’m always in awe of her when she’s on stage or on the the silver screen. She has so much talent in her pinky finger alone that I would love to be near her, just in the hopes that some of it would rub off on me! If I could be someone in another life, she would definitely be at the top of my list.
6. Jennifer Aniston: She played Rachel-freaking-Green in the best show known to man, has aged graciously and beautifully, and is 100000% goals. You should need no other convincing.
7. Anna Kendrick: She is the type of endearing awkward that I hope that I am. Her sense of humor is on point and I know my stomach would constantly hurt from laughing at her if she was in my #GirlSquad. I would hands down marry her any day of the week.
8. Ashley Tisdale: She has come a long way from her days in The Suite Life of Zack & Cody and HSM. She’s done everything from acting to music to producing to owning her own successful business. This girl demonstrates that you can most definitely have your cake and eat it, too. She shows me what pure determination and hard work can get you in this world.
9. Witney Carson: She won the mirror ball trophy on Dancing with the Stars with Alfonso Ribeiro in only her second season on the show at 21 years of age. Kthanksbye.
10. Taylor Swift: I’m not going to lie, placing her on this list is making my country music fan heart hurt a little bit. But, I have to give credit where credit is due. She has proved herself a force to be reckoned with. Her talent for creating unforgettable shows is incredible and she has the kindest heart toward her fans. I’m honestly amazed at how real/normal of a person she is and based off of her Tumblr page, I think we could be best friends.

I love dreaming about the future. LOVE IT. So, naturally, the new year is one of my most treasured times of year. It’s a season filled with hope for all that is to come. Everyone is ready to put the past year behind them and face the new one head on.

I also love the new year because it means resolutions. I might be part of the lone population that actually loves making resolutions and setting goals for myself. I’m a goal digger. It gets me excited about the future because I know it’s filled with endless possibilities and achievements. Of course I’m much better at coming up with my resolutions than actually keeping them, but ma la’asot (hebrew for “what can you do?”).

So, I thought that I would share with you a list of goals, dreams and activities I would like to accomplish in 2016, in hopes that whoever reads this will hold me accountable throughout the year.

2k16 Goals

1. Take a dance class.
2. Travel to at least 1 new place.
3. Finish writing 2 books.
4. Run a half marathon.
5. Learn ASL.
6. Finish redecorating my room (so I can start living like an adult).
7. Maintain a healthy weight that makes me feel confident.
8. Learn to skateboard.
9. Swim with Otters!
10. Learn to shoot a bow & arrow.
11. Visit the Wizarding World of Harry Potter.
12. Learn to shoot a gun.
13. Participate in a stay-cation in Sacramento.
14. Be able to do the splits.
15. Learn how to play the guitar.
16. Volunteer my time & skills.
17. Take a solo trip to somewhere new!
18. Open a savings account strictly for travel.
19. Take a Hebrew class.
20. Learn real self defense.
21. Create a budget & stick to it.
22. Go snowboarding.
23. Establish a blog presence and style.

I’ve also decided that I want to focus on one word for 2016: HUSTLE. I want  to work hard to achieve everything I’ve set before myself for the year and to see little pieces of my big dreams come into fruition. I want to look back at this year and say that I hustled with determination through everything that was thrown at me. Hard work pays off and reaps great rewards and  I’m gonna whistle while I hustle through 2016.